The Plague Dogs 2: Unda da Sea!
by StupidSequel
Summary: Continues from where Plague Dogs left off. Rowf and Snitter were reincarnated as Spongebob and Patrick respectively. They must stop Mr. Krabs's plot to pull New York City underwater, and Mr. Krabs's motive will blow your mind!


**The Plague Dogs 2: Unda da Sea!**

**(AN: I saw Plague Dogs streamed on Netflix and I enjoyed it very much even though it was probably the most depressing movie I've ever seen. If you haven't watched it yet, don't, unless you're in the mood for a tearjerker film with zero humor or lightheartedness. This sequel will fix what was "wrong" with the first Plague Dogs by being as funny and non-serious as possible.)**

"I'm still alive? But how? Wait. Dogs can't breathe underwater, can they? Whoa, is that you, Snitter? But you look like a starfish!"

"A yellow sponge wearing clothes? You got to be kidding me! Wait, Rowf? Whoa, this is totally weird. It's like I died, but I came back to life as marine life and I still retain memories of my past life as a dog."

Rowf and Snitter decided to explore the ocean. They came to a quaint but hyper town called Bikini Bottom.

"Know what, Snitter? Since we're no longer dogs, we might as well forge new identities. I will be known as Spongebob Squarepants from now on."

"And I will be known as Patrick Star from now on," Snitter spoke up. Rowf=Spongebob and Snitter=Patrick. Remember that now. Please note, this is not a crossover. This really is where Spongebob Squarepants originated. The whole Spongebob series on Nickelodeon is just a continuation of the movie Plague Dogs, with Rowf reincarnated as Spongebob and Snitter reincarnated as Patrick. Betcha didn't know that, did ya?

Spongebob saw a nice lovely pineapple and decided to move into it and Patrick moved into a half sphere boulder adjacent to the pineapple. Spongebob decided to sleep off the day's adventures. I think running from the army, swimming, drowning to death, and coming back to life as a sponge would tire one out considerably. He got up and according to the clock on the wall the time was 11 am. He hated getting up that late.

"But I'm always a morning person. And I don't have money for an alarm clock. I know. I'll get a job." So Spongebob applied for and successfully got a job at the Krusty Krab.

When Spongebob walked in Krab's office, he saw him at his computer, not being able to get it to work.

"I *BEEP*ING HATE WINDOWS!" Krabs screamed. Then he said in a calmer voice, "This is the most ridiculous error message I've ever gotten. It says: The economy is not bad enough right now. This computer is powered by bad economies." Spongebob chuckled. If he could foretell the future, he would have gotten away from the Krusty Krab as quickly as possible right then.

"For the last time, my name is THE TOD, not SQUIDWARD! NEPTUNE!" A squid with a big, bulbous nose screamed. He worked at the cashier.

"The Tod? You were reincarnated, too?" Spongebob asked him.

"Yes. The last thing I remember I was a fox on a train or something. The author of this story is kinda fuzzy on the details of the Plague Dogs movie. He's only seen it once and if he sees it again he might cry and ruin what would otherwise be an awesome, upbeat happy moment with sadness. For some reason everybody calls me Squidward."

"I was reincarnated too. I used to be a big black dog named Rowf, but I have forged a new identity. Everybody calls me Spongebob, and my friend used to be a Jack Russel terrier with a canvas on his head, and his name was Snitter, but he was reincarnated as a starfish, and his new name is Patrick."

"Uh huh. I liked my identity, but I guess the name Squidward would help me forget about the awful days of you two being chased by evil animal researchers. Krabs has been acting, you know, kinda funny lately, like he's been making comparisons between New York City and the Lost City of Atlantis." Spongebob and Patrick exchanged confuzzled glances.

After the Krusty Krab was to close for the night, Krabs was sneaking over across the street over to the Chum Bucket.

"Hey, Plankton, I need your help. I need to go to villain school to learn to become a super villain."

"Nice try, but what's in it for me? Like, what are you trying to do?" Plankton did not like these sudden requests.

"Well," Krabs looked around to make sure no one was looking, and then whispered in Plankton's probably ear. "I want to attach thousands of fishing hooks to New York City and move it under the sea because that would seriously cripple the U.S. economy. Apparently making everyone leave Kentucky Kingdom just to eat super good Krusty Krab wasn't enough, so I need to try on a BIGGER SCALE! Why am I ambitious to do this? I have a computer that won't start and I got an error message telling me that it's powered by bad economies, or some shit like that, and I got that OS upgrade like two weeks ago, and I really wanna try out Roller Coaster Tycoon 5. I hear it's the most awesomest tycoon game ever. From what I hear, it's even more realistic than real life. It actually LACKS Looney Tunes physics! W00t!"

"Well said," Plankton rubbed his paws together while sniggering. "I want you to try Roller Coaster Tycoon 5. I think it's gonna be awesome. Now about my..."

"Okay, you can have the Krabby Patty secret formula." And Krabs did just that.

"What the fuck is this?" Plankton was puzfused. "The definite integral of e to the x squared from endpoints negative 17 to 13 times an indefinite improper integral of a sine function of e to the x factorial, times some kind of function requiring Ohm's law? Shoot, I haven't even mastered the chain rule, and you expect me to do infinite series coupled with inverse secant substitution?"

"Told ya it was a secret formula. And you have to do similar problems to find the quantifier of each ingredient." Krabs added.

"No prob," Plankton insisted. He slipped the paper into the universal God mode math problem solver. "OH! So I need..." Plankton called out each quantifier of each ingredient in the Krabby Patty secret formula.

"Exactly," Krabs said. "But I must warn you, getting slightly the wrong amount of any one ingredient could make it a Crappy Patty instead."

"Gotcha!" Plankton went back to work on his first ever successful Krabby Patty.

9 a.m. Time to go to work the next day. Spongebob did not really believe that Mr. Krabs could really lower New York City into the sea via a bunch of fish hooks. Could he?

"Nah! I'm not goin to work today. Today I don't feel like doin anything. I just wanna lay in my bed." Then Spongebob yelled out the window, "DON'T FEEL LIKE PICKIN UP MY PHONE, SO LEAVE YOUR MESSAGE AT THE TONE! KAY?"

"OKAY!" Squidward shouted back at him. "Jeez!" Spongebob went back to sleep.

_Stupid work. It's too hard and boring. _Spongebob decided to spend the day playing E.T. For the Atari 2600. _At least this game is still pretty fun. _When he realized he had forgotten to eat, sleep, or go to the bathroom out of being so engrossed in his game, or even get any physical activity at all (apart from his thumbs, of course) he decided to go for a mile jog outside. When he stepped out the door and jogged, guess what? He lost his breath after about the first few yards. Not in shape like he thought he was, eh? He looked overhead to see a bunch of fish hooks. _What the hell? _He saw this as the perfect opportunity to play hookey (get it?).

As he steadily approached the hooks, he saw Mr. Krabs and Plankton transporting them away.

"What are you doing with the fish hooks? I need them to play hookey, oh hey, Mr. Krabs. Howdy!" Spongebob failed to hide his high anxiety. Mr. Krabs narrowed his eyes.

"Shouldn't you be at work? No one is supposed to know about my plan to move New York City underwater so that that can destroy the U.S. Economy, and then I will open a Krusty Krab next to the place where New York City used to be. Oops, shouldn't have told you that." Spongebob remembered about the time when Mr. Krabs opened a Krusty Krab next to Kentucky Kingdom, back when I was high on LSD enough to write Shaman Squarepants. It seemed like everywhere other than Bikini Bottom that Mr. Krabs opened a Krusty Krab, it would somehow negatively affect the economy of that region._ Somehow negatively affect the economy of that region? _"That's it! I think I know what to do now!" Spongebob bragged.

Spongebob told Patrick about the whole situation, and after about 46 attempts, Patrick finally understood. Together they began building their own Krusty Krab, right next to the fish hook store, which was just outside of Bikini Bottom. Sure enough, the fish hook store went out of business. Spongebob and Patrick gave each other a high five. "But we still have to do something-" Patrick started.

"Dude, he only has like four hooks. That's nowhere near enough to pull New York City under the ocean." The four fish hooks then attached to the land and then they began pulling New York City under. "OH TARTARSAUCE! I was wrong!" Spongebob kicked himself in the crotch somehow. The giant big Applesauce was slowly being pulled into Bikini Bottom. It was so big that it crushed the entirety of Bikini Bottom, and the surrounding rural areas. "It's the end of the world! This must be why the Mayans predicted 2012!" Spongebob cried. Part of the massive city fell onto the Krusty Krab that Spongebob and Patrick had built. That was the last straw! "This is madness! THIS. IS. BIKINI BOTTOM!" Spongebob said in a manner exactly like the memetic guy from 300. He charged into the Krusty Krab where he probably got fired from, but he wasn't here for it. "Freeze, Mr. Craps!" Spongebob pointed his finger at him because 4Kids won't let him have a gun! Rrrgh!

"You're too late, Rowf, I mean, Spongebob! New York City is now the new Atlantis. I shall build a Krusty Krab near where New York City used to be, and then it'll be economic Armageddon! The Euro-zone crisis will be a mere bramble scratch compared to this!" Mr. Krabs laughed maniacally.

"C'mon, Patrick, we gotta somehow reverse the damage Mr. Krabs caused."

"Fat chance. Speaking of fat, yo momma's so fat, it wasn't my fish hooks that turned NYC into Atlantis 2. It was yo momma!" Mr. Krabs laughed at his own horribly overused joke.

"C'mon, Patrick, we need lots and lots of duct tape," Spongebob beckoned for Patrick to come on. Spongebob used his emergency credit card that I definitely did not make up just now for the sake of convenience. He used it to buy exactly 906 rolls of duct tape. _This should be plenty. _

Next they ventured over into Sandy's tree dome.

"Hey, Sandy, could we use your assistance?" Spongebob called to her.

"Whatever for?" Sandy offered.

"I am conducting a series of experiments-" Patrick began, and then Spongebob nudged him to signal to him that he said the wrong thing. "Oh, I mean we need your super over 9000 Chuck Norris strength to move New York city back to its proper place so we can duct tape it in place," Patrick corrected himself.

"Just a minute. For a task this huge, I gotta warm up." Sandy started jogging laps around her tree dome, did some jumping jacks, did some push ups, and finally some stretching. "Okay, I'm ready, I'm ready!"

"Dude, you stole my catch phrase! To hell with you!" Spongebob gave a rude gesture, and then he was calm again.

Spongebob and Patrick gathered all 906 rolls of duct tape and laid a bunch of strips out all over where New York City used to be. Then Sandy emerged from the sea with the giant city rested firmly on her back. She placed it directly on top of the duct tape. A perfect fit!

"NOOO! MY PLAN RUINED! NOW HOW WILL I WATCH MY LITTLE PONY OR PLAY ROLLER COASTER TYCOON 5?" Krabs wailed. "My computer is useless because it's powered by bad economies, and the economy is now perfect because New York City is back in place!" Krabs kicked the Chum Bucket.

"One more thing we gotta resolve," Spongebob muttered. He and Patrick started building a Krusty Krab near Congress. Sure enough, the Krusty Krab destroyed the economy of Congress, thus improving the nation's economy even further because Congress was now no longer able to widen the gap between the rich and the poor. Congratulations, Spongebob and Patrick are officially smarter than the government.


End file.
